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Warning Signs

No Right To Harm - Girls Againist Domestic Violence
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Warning Signs:
Are you being abused?

What to look for........some of these signs are visible very early in a relationship.
  • Emotionally abuses (insults you, ignores you, acts sulky/angery when you initiate an idea)
  • Tells you who you may be friends with, how you should dress, or tries to control other elements of your life or relationship.
  • Talks negatively about women in general.
  • Gets jealous when there is no reason.
  • Drinks heavily, uses drugs, or tries to get you drunk.
  • Berates you.
  • Is physically violent to you or others, even if it's "just" getting pushy or grapping.
  • Unable to handle sexual and emotional frustrations without becoming angry.
  • Does not view you as an equal--because he sees himself smarter than you.
  • Thinks poorly of himself and guards his masculinity by acting tough.
  • Goes through extreme highs and lows
  • Is angery and threating to the extent that you have changed your life so as not to anger him.

Abuser Profile:
  • Uncontrolled temper.
  • Has poor coping skills.
  • Unreasonable and demanding at times
  • Unpredictable
  • Gives double messages...pendulum swings from loving to abusive.
  • Denys that the abuse occured or makes light of violent episodes.
  • Blames the victim, other people or outside events for the violent attack.
  • Say they are not acting out of anger.
  • Say they are not reacting to stress.
  • Extremly jealous.
  • Express remorse and begs for forgiveness with seemingly loving gestures.
  • Intense fear of abandonment.
  • A background involving physical, emotional or sexual abuse.
  • Unrealistic expectations of a relationship.
  • Recklessness.
  • Inability to accept responsibility for their behavor and actions.
  • Cruelty to children and animals.
  • Threats of violence.
  • Low self-esteem, shame.
  • Inability to respect interpersonal boundaries.
  • Emotional volatitiy- fear of being "out of control".
  • Need for power and control to compensate for the above.


Many of the characteristics above are documented trauma-based adapations to childhood emotional, physical, and sexual abuse.